LESSON #13 — The Dark Side of Fresh Starts: Nothing Resets Just Because the Calendar Changed
- Loretta & David Allseitz
- Jan 1
- 3 min read
AKA: The clock didn’t save you. The champagne didn’t cleanse you. And January doesn’t erase patterns.
If Lesson 12 taught you how to stop wasting time gathering useless information,
Lesson 13 teaches you something colder — and way more necessary.
Time doesn’t change anything.
Decisions do.
Because once you stop believing the calendar owes you a reset,
you stop waiting for permission to do what you already know needs to happen.
January isn’t a fresh start.
It’s a mirror.
And what it reflects depends entirely on what you’ve been avoiding.
Let’s break it down, dark-side style.
The Fresh Start Myth
Every January, the internet pretends something magical happened at midnight.
New year.
New you.
Clean slate.
Fresh energy.
No.
You woke up the same person… just hungover and pressured.
Time doesn’t reset behavior.
Calendars don’t erase patterns.
And champagne has never fixed a damn thing. (Vodka on the other hand...)
If nothing actually changes — habits, choices, boundaries, honesty — then January is just December in a new font.
Why People Love Fresh Starts
Fresh starts are seductive because they feel like effort without requiring action.
You don’t have to:
confront the habit
end the situation
tell the truth
make the hard choice
accept the loss
You just say, “This year will be different.”
Dark-side translation:
“I don’t want to deal with this yet.”
Time Doesn’t Change People — Pressure Does
People swear they’ll change eventually.
After the holidays.
After things calm down.
After the new year.
After one more chance.
But here’s the dark-side truth:
If time alone changed people, everyone would be healed by now.
Change only happens when continuing becomes more uncomfortable than stopping.
January doesn’t create pressure.
Decisions do.
Fresh Starts Are Often Avoidance in Disguise
Watch closely.
Most “fresh starts” are really just:
unresolved endings
unmade decisions
postponed conversations
relationships on life support
habits on pause instead of deleted
People love starting new chapters without finishing the last one.
That’s not growth.
That’s clutter.
The Real Reset No One Talks About
There is a reset — but it doesn’t come with fireworks.
It looks like:
choosing discomfort over familiarity
ending something without replacing it
doing the boring thing consistently
stopping the performance
accepting that some years are for cleanup, not glow-ups
Dark-side logic says:
You don’t get a fresh start.
You get a clean break — if you’re brave enough to make one.
THE SCENARIO — January 1st Delusion
It’s New Year’s Day.
You tell yourself:
“I’ll fix it this year.”
Same job.
Same relationship.
Same habits.
Same conversations you’ve been having with yourself for three years.
But now you’ve added a new layer:
Expectation.
And expectation without action is just pressure waiting to turn into shame.
Your dark side notices something:
You don’t need a new year.
You need a new decision.
SURVIVAL QUIZ — New Year Edition
Dark-side pop quiz time!
Let’s see if you choose survival…
…or put a sparkly “new year” sticker on your old bullshit and call it progress.
THE QUIZ SCENARIO — The January Lie
It’s the first week of the year.
You feel motivated.
Hopeful.
Restless.
You keep telling yourself:
“I’ll deal with it soon.”
But nothing has actually changed yet.
Your dark side leans in.
This is a setup. Choose wisely.
THE QUESTION:
What’s the actual DARK-SIDE survival move here?
Choose carefully:
A) Make a detailed vision board and trust the process
(Aesthetic procrastination.)
B) Declare “this is my year” and tell everyone your plans
(Performance without traction.)
C) Identify the one thing you’ve been avoiding ending — and take one concrete step toward closing it
(Uncomfortable. Effective. Real.)
D) Wait for motivation to hit before acting
(Motivation follows action. Not the other way around.)
COMMENT YOUR PICK — the official dark-side answer gets revealed at the start of the next lesson.
Choose wisely…or ride the same busted horse into February and act surprised when it throws you off.
Missed Previous Lessons? Check them out here: Lessons from the Dark Side 💀
Villains Welcome.
*If you’re drawn to dark truths and the stories they leave behind, start with The Dollmaker of Point on Amazon.
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