LESSON #11 — Confidence Changes the Way People Lie to You
- Loretta & David Allseitz
- 1 day ago
- 3 min read
AKA: Christmas is excellent cover for bad behavior.
PREVIOUS LESSON QUIZ ANSWER
Before we get into today’s lesson, let’s close out the quiz from Lesson 10.
You were asked what to do when you’re ready to start something publicly — not perfectly, just honestly — but freeze the moment you imagine people watching.
The correct dark-side answer?
C.
C) Take one visible step, even if it’s imperfect.
(This is how confidence is built.)
Because here’s the truth:
You don’t become confident before you’re seen.
You become confident because you were seen and survived it.
Alright.
Now let’s talk about what happens after you stop hiding —and why Christmas suddenly feels… revealing.
LESSON #11 — Confidence Changes the Way People Lie to You
If Lesson 10 taught you to stop hiding and be seen,
Lesson 11 teaches you what happens once you are.
People stop being careful.
People stop being subtle.
People start assuming you’ll “be nice” — especially at Christmas.
You’re not seeing more dishonesty because people got worse.
You’re seeing it because you stopped helping them hide it.
Let’s break it down, dark-side style.
Christmas Is Prime Time for Getting Away With Shit
Think about it.
How many times have you heard:
“It’s Christmas.”
“Let’s not ruin the holidays.”
“Can we talk about this after?”
“Just let it go for now.”
Translation?
Lower your standards temporarily so no one feels uncomfortable.
Christmas doesn’t make people better.
It makes bad behavior easier to hide.
Because everyone is pressured to smile through it.
Confidence Ruins the Holiday Script
Here’s the shift most people don’t notice:
When you’re unsure, people tailor their stories carefully.
When you’re confident, they rush.
They assume you won’t question them.
They assume you’ll give grace.
They assume the season will do the work for them.
And when you don’t?
They panic.
Why People Lie Worse Around Confident People
Because confidence removes the safety net.
Confident people don’t:
rush to reassure
smooth over awkwardness
help someone land their explanation
pretend confusion is clarity
They listen.
And listening — real listening — makes liars nervous.
Because now they have to carry the whole story alone.
Holiday Lies Rely on Emotional Pressure
Christmas lies are usually padded with:
nostalgia
tears
family language
“good intentions”
“I didn’t mean it like that”
The story sounds warm.
But the details don’t line up.
And confident people notice the gap.
Not because they’re suspicious —but because they’re no longer distracted by keeping the peace.
The Aha Moment Nobody Talks About
Here it is:
People don’t lie better during the holidays.
They lie louder, because they assume no one will challenge it.
Christmas is cover.
Confidence removes the cover.
And suddenly the story starts wobbling.
THE SCENARIO — Christmas Eve Clarification
It’s Christmas Eve.
Someone pulls you aside with:
“I just want to clear the air before the holidays…”
They sound sincere.
Emotional.
Prepared.
Old-you would’ve helped:
filled in missing context
reassured intent
softened the moment
This year?
You don’t.
You listen.
You stay neutral.
You don’t react.
They keep talking.
They repeat themselves.
They add details you didn’t ask for.
They circle back — slightly differently.
And that’s when it hits.
You didn’t catch them lying.
They ran out of room to maintain the story.
Why This Keeps Happening at Christmas
Because Christmas teaches people:
If I act emotional enough,
If I sound sincere enough,
If I say “family” enough,
I won’t be questioned.
Confidence breaks that spell.
SURVIVAL QUIZ — Holiday Edition
Dark-side pop quiz time!
Let’s see if you choose survival…
...or believe the story just because it’s wrapped in tinsel.
THE QUIZ SCENARIO — The Holiday Explanation
It’s Christmas Eve.
Someone gives you a story that doesn’t fully add up.
They’re watching your face.
Waiting for reassurance.
Waiting for the holiday discount.
You feel the moment.
This is where most people cave.
Your dark side leans in.
This is a setup. Choose wisely.
THE QUESTION:
What’s the actual DARK-SIDE survival move here?
Choose carefully:
A) Ask questions so it makes sense
(Watch where the story breaks.)
B) Point out what doesn’t add up
(Congrats, you just helped them lie better.)
C) Stay neutral and let them keep talking
(You’ll get the rehearsed version.)
D) Smooth it over so Christmas isn’t awkward
(Nothing says peace like swallowing bullshit.)
COMMENT YOUR PICK — the official dark-side answer gets revealed at the start of Lesson 11.
Choose wisely… or clap for a performance you’ll be side-eyeing in January.
Missed Previous Lessons? Check them out here: Lessons from the Dark Side 💀
Villains Welcome.
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